Cracked Yaoi on Weed
by ZoZoBlAcKiEcHaN
Summary: This is a one shot thing my friend and I did. We took ALL of our manga Over 200! and we took a speech bubble and an action from each. Then we made it grammatical. And voila! One shot Kingdom Hearts Yaoi Fanfic on drugs!


Axel slid his arm around Roxas' shoulder. "Please accept this token of my gratitude," Axel said, green eyes flashing. Suddenly, Roxas collapsed. "We'll just have to smash you so flat you can't regenerate," sneered a pink haired man...woman.....thing. Marulxia.

Axel, completely ignoring Marluxia, kneeled down and wiped some of Roxas' blood off of his black organization coat. "It doesn't bother me, of course," he gloated.

Larxene's dual blonde antennae popped behind Roxas, and she snatched the boy away from Axel. "I want to see what you really are!" she shrieked, wrenching down the zipper to his coat and undoing it entirely.

Marluxia, of course, hated being ignored, and began to cry out, "One more layer, one more layer!" with tears in its eyes.

Axel grabbed back Roxas from the blonde. "Do not let anyone know I am your daughter." Larxene crouched down and covered her head with her arms for protection from this maniac. "I'll show YOU mastery," she screamed, not knowing quite what she was saying. It was very quiet. Axel placed Roxas on the floor and leaned over him protectively. "That's all right...I quit," Roxas whispered softly.

Axel put his finger up to Roxas' mouth, as an attempt to shush him. Roxas, however, licked Axel's fingers with a tint of lust in his deep blue eyes. "Is something wrong? You look pale."

All of a sudden, out of nowhere, a puff of smoke appeared. And, as if they were summoned from another realm, Saix and Xemnas seemed to be holding each other, Saix in-behind Xemnas, holding him close to his chest. "What's the matter-- is that all you can do?" Axel taunted, leaning further over Roxas.

From beneath Xemnas' coat, DiZ appeared. "This is the only way; I'll offer myself in return," he chuckled.

DiZ disappeared, and then reappeared where Axel and Roxas were laying. He shoved the redhead out of the way without much effort, and rolled Roxas over onto his stomach. He then straddled the boy, making him unable to move. Lowering his lips to Roxas' ear, he whispered, "I've stripped lots of guys down to their underwear."

Marluxia, feeling ignored, got up and pulled out a pair of brass knuckles. "My luck really IS turning around!" it sang gaudily. It raced towards Xemnas and attempted to punch him, only to be stopped by a look from Saix. "I heard the sound of something breaking," Saix muttered under his breath. He was, of course, referring to Marluxia's soul.

DiZ, teasing Axel, leaned forward and kissed Roxas on the cheek. "If he remembers what he did, this child will break," he breathed.

At that, DiZ released his grip on Roxas. Getting up, looking terrified, Roxas ran and hugged Axel around the waist violently. "He's coming!" the boy squealed.

"...Delicious?" The sound came from a brunette with mullet hairstyle. Demyx had just come back from clubbing, and had gotten himself some kind of wasted.

Demyx turned to Saix and the Superior, and ran towards them at full speed. He glomped Saix around the waist, and caught him off guard. "Hehe, well, never mind," he mumbled.

Saix grabbed Demyx by the front of them coat, and shook him violently. He never did like this David Bowie cosplayer knock-off, and he was already pissed about Marluxia. "Yes, but I fail to see where this is going," Saix grumbled, throwing Demyx aside. He didn't know if he was still alive or not, and honestly didn't care.

DiZ noticed Roxas hugging Axel, and didn't like it. He strode over in his condescending way, and ripped the smaller body off of the taller one. "This is fun! THIS IS REALLY FUN!" he giggled. DiZ looked at Roxas for a while. He then zipped his coat up all the way. "What can one do but surrender," Roxas sighed. He liked being half naked. It meant he could show off his muscles to everyone.

Axel ran his fingers through his spiked hair. "Your such a jerk!" he whined. Axel ran over to Roxas and threw him over his shoulder, backing away slowly from DiZ. "Well, what do you want?" the redhead growled.

From the sidelines, Larxene was enjoying the view of the boys fighting over each others' bodies. Her nose began to bleed. "How about we make some kids too?" she called out, again, not realizing what she had said.

Larxene stood up and ran into the crowd of people. She noticed Marluxia on the ground, looking like a drooling vegetable, and went to help it up. "AAA!!! C'EST IMPOSSIBLE!" Marluxia cried. Larxene had picked Marluxia up bridal style. Marluxia squirmed and Larxene plopped him at her feet. "But this time, you got beat," she moaned.

Saix and Xemnas, circling around Marluxia and Larxene, were now closing in on them. "And is that a piece of wood?" Xemnas laughed.

Saix looked over and saw Zexion, the castle's emo, walk in. He had stabbed his hand again. "So you really think all those memories were fake?" the emo boy asked.

Axel went to pet Roxas on the head, but Roxas turned around and bit him. "Next up, is me," the boy breathed, his voice heavy with a seductive tone. Axel winked. "The same way I was ordered here," he grinned.

Saix, seeing the sexual intent of Roxas and Axel, jabbed his finger at the door, forcing them to take their leave. "_But this is what I must do_," the couple whined in unison.

In this time, Xemnas had knocked out Marluxia and Larxene, who were now fast asleep. "Ah, but seeing their bodies glistening with droplets of water would be even more..." Xemnas trailed off. He leaned over picking up Marluxia off the ground. "My hands slipped, and I dropped it," he chuckled darkly. "It wants more?" Xemnas looked over to see Saix squealing like a fangirl at the yaoi innuendo. Without further warning, Demyx popped up from behind Saix. He wasn't unconscious anymore, but he was still drunk. Demyx tackle-glomped Saix to the ground, and refused to let go. "Rinse your eyes in the river," he slurred.

He then turned Saix around to sit him on his knee, and hugged him like that. Demyx was surprisingly strong. "This may be a little rough," Saix said, grimacing.

He put his hands on the wall behind Demyx, breathing in his face. "POISON! My mouth is ruined!" Demyx screamed. He began to cry, worrying he might lose some innocence. "What about clean-up duty?" he whimpered. Marluxia, waking up in Xemnas' arms, lifted his brass knuckles to his mouth and licked them sexily. "I'd heard that you two'd be in here..." he said. Xemnas, in return to Marluxia's actions, smirked, and roughly twisted him to the ground. He then bound his hands, and stuffed Marluxia in a closet. "Continue your story," He said, taunting the bound man... woman.... it...

Zexion finally fainted from blood loss. Before he hit the ground, though, Larxene caught him in shaky hands. "Sounds like things have been rather festive while I was gone," she smiled weakly.

Xemnas smirked. But suddenly, he had the hands of Larxene, Roxas, Axel, Demyx and Saix clutching him. Axel held him by the back with his arms hooked around Xemnas' shoulders. Roxas had his left leg, and Larxene his right. Saix was in the front, sexually harassing him, and Demyx hugged Saix. "Of course you can see me; tonight, the clouds are covering the moon," they all whispered in unison, as though they were under mind control.

DiZ, seeing that his plan had worked, smiled deeply and evily. "You-you can still get up?" He laughed.


End file.
